Thursday, July 8, 2010

Hey Dude Buddy!

Dude #1: Who's in your Final Four?

Dude #2: Rachel McAdams, Tyra Banks, Ali Larter, and Elizabeth Hurley.

Dude #1: That's not what I was talking about.

Dude #2: I know, but just imagine the spread on the title game.

Chick #1: I just can't believe Spitzer paid that girl four thousand dollars for one night. I'm totally in the wrong line of work.

Chick #2: I don't know... you probably wouldn't get to choose who you have sex with. Spitzer's an ugly motherfucker.

Chick #1: I don't choose what ad accounts I work on, either! And I hate some of those assholes.

Chick #2: Yeah, but the guy kept his socks on. That's so weird.

Chick #1: Honey, for four grand a night, he can dress up as Kermit and call me Piggy.

Suit #1: Man, I've never been so glad I got out of Bear Stearns stock.

Suit #2: Seriously - J.P. Morgan got a hell of a bargain there.

Suit #1: I think the Yankees paid more for A-Rod!

Suit #2: Yeah, and Bear Stearns and A-Rod have won the same number of World Series.

Dude: Can I buy you a drink?

Chick: No hablo ingl├ęs.Dude: ¿Bien, puedo comprarte una bebida?

Chick: Ich spreche nicht Spanischen.

Suit: Hey, honey, what time do you get off?

Cindy the Barmaid: About a half hour after I stop thinking about you.

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